Best (Wo-) Man...

As my sister's maid of honor, I've done pretty much nothing she's asked me to do thus far.  Not because I don't care, but because I feel like I should have a more exciting job than finding out my cousin's street address (Sharon, if you're reading this, please text Chris your address!).  So today, I was offered an opportunity to redeem myself: Designing the "Save the Date" cards.  Finally!  A task worthy of my time and talents!

After many many minutes of hard work, I was promptly fired when my sister received, what I think is, a genius design. See Below.

I would definitely use this card if I were the one getting married,  Except I would be taller, holding a beer, and wearing a Browns shirt.  Because, clearly, I'm much classier than my sister.  Also, I refuse to get all sappy and serious when it comes to weddings.  First of all, it is not your "one special day."  In all likelihood, you will have one or two more "special days" in your lifetime, so don't sweat it if you fuck the first one up a little bit.  Look at it as a rehearsal for wedding number 2. Or 3. Or, if you're Larry King, 9.  Secondly, I really like this card.  For as crude of a drawing as this may be, it actually looks like my sister.  Now that's talent. 

So, after being cruelly fired from this task, I've decided to beat my sister to the printer and send out version 2.howdareyoufireme of my "Save the Date" card. 

And for this, I don't mind finding the addresses of pretty much anyone she's ever known.
Side note: There were a few alternate versions of this card, my favorite of which is one where Chrissie looks like a tiny baby, and a fanged Jude is mauling her, but my drawing skills leave too much to be desired, and I feared that no one would know what it was. Also, I didn't think it was appropriate for a wedding.

(P.S. Love you, Chrissie!!!)